Gay Retirement

If most retirement homes are run by church groups who don’t support equal rights for the gay community, then what will happen to us when we are forced into care?

The subject of “old age” has preoccupied me for many years. As a child watching a Tarzan movie, I can remember a group of greedy treasure hunters raiding an elephants’ graveyard for the ivory it contained. What tugged at my heartstrings most wasn’t the stolen tusks, but the thought of older elephants having to retire to a place far from their herd to die alone.

I was horrified that any living creature, mammal or otherwise, should have to face the final curtain on its own. Surely, nature had a better plan. Recently, the scene popped back into my head as I pondered over life’s third act. What happens to gay and lesbian seniors after retirement and are they offered a happier ending than that of a pachyderm starring in a black and white movie?

Believing I was being original – turns out I was wrong, I suggested to MBH (my better half) that a retirement village for the gay community might be the answer to the conundrum. Wouldn’t it be great if we were able to enjoy our golden years amidst like-minded people in an environment where one could feel safe and accepted? Common interests would bring residents together. Quoting lines from “Little Britain” to neighbours would no longer raise blank stares.

And just picture the array of activities and entertainment that would be on offer! Sure, the thought of a Priscilla talent show for seniors might not be everyone’s cup of tea, especially if the performers are residents reliving their drag days decked out in dusty, old sequined costumes. But I rather like the idea of a village where people can gather, enjoy each other’s company and rely on one another for support.

A study by Witek-Coombs reveals that 25% of the gay community will be aged over 60 by 2020. Many of these potential retirees will be seeking a community where they can relax and be themselves whilst being cared for. These requirements are often overlooked in mainstream facilities where residents are at risk of getting mistreated for being openly gay. Some are split from their partners. Others experience physical or mental abuse from their peers and long-term care givers.

Australian federal laws do not currently recognise discrimination on sexuality or gender as they do on race or age issues. Gay activists hope to get this changed as more than half of the aged-care sector is made up of church-run facilities. Luckily, plans have been approved by the Australian government to build the nation’s first gay and lesbian retirement village near Ballan, in regional Victoria. This complex will hopefully set a benchmark and inspire other states to follow suit.

In a perfect world, there would be no discrimination and no need for separate retirement facilities for gay people. However, judging by our religious and political leaders’ stance on civil partnerships, gay marriage and civil rights, that perfect world isn’t likely to come about in Australia any time soon.

So perhaps, for those who are able to afford it, an alternative to mainstream retirement homes is worth considering. After all, gay retirement should mean retiring from work, not retiring from being gay. MBH tells me he’ll think about it, so long as I never make him dress up in drag. Pity as I’ve got great ideas for a new double act!

The thought of being forced back into the closet or ending up the only gay in the village is far worse a fate. On that we both agree.